Being a Dad

1. Dads are constant. We are always in the mood for sex. If we ever turn sex down we regret it immediately. And for weeks afterwards. On the rare occasion that we may have something else to attend to (see point 3.) we regret it instantly. If you are ever offended that we did not accept the proposition, find some comfort in the fact that we regretted saying no ... and are still regretting it.

2. Dads are young. I say this because we live through our young son(s) or daughter(s). We see the world through their eyes very very easily. More easily than you do. In fact, I think one of the reasons we decide to have children is because we need an excuse to be childlike. And this is the perfect one. The chance to spend an extra 15min studying the action figures. The opportunity to examine those extras that come with the Baby Born. Looking at the detail. Reading the packaging. Marveling at the advancement of the toy. We remember what it was like when we were young and we're living the moment as if it were ours. Without kids we would never have the opportunity without being called really weird. This makes us young at heart.

3. Dads fix things. Tons of things. We fix bikes, dolls, balls, swimming pools, play-sets, swords. But we also fix doors, light-bulbs, mirrors, hose-pipes, chairs, frames. We fix accounts, business mergers, organizational structures and teams. Because we're build to fix things we naturally do the same for relationships, friendships, family arguments, diets that have gone wrong or the dress that doesn't fit. The moment we have the detail, we set out to fix it. One of the greatest lessons that I've come to learn as a Dad is that I don't always have to fix the situation .. sometimes all I need to do is listen to it (that still leaves me a little empty, but the results are amazing) ... I feel as if I didn't do anything but everything works out. We're the fixit-up-chappies.

4. Dads are martyrs. They believe that the whole bloody thing all exists because of them. Everything. This is probably because of the stereotypical breadwinner. If I had to be hit by a bus tomorrow it would all fall apart. So this leads us to behave in way that nothing would continue without us. We're omnipotent. Sadly, Dads, this is not the case. Yes, we're a very important part of the whole mix ... and to this point I've agreed with my wife that I'd like my kids' kids to have a great big grandaddy that tells wicked stories one day ... but without us, life (sadly) would find a way to survive. Here's the thought on this one: don't give so much of yourself that you run dry. You're not a martyr. You're important, without a doubt - but you're allowed to take time for yourself. Things will carry on.

5. Dads love technology. The new plasma TV. That Sola-dom in the kitchen. Playstation, PSP, DvD, PvR. WHOOOARRRGHHHH. It all turns us on. We love the gadgets, gizmo's and remotes that turn this world around. We don't necessarily know how it all works ... but the new polystyrene box that just arrived feels the first Jedi Knight action figure we bought when we were 12. Leave us alone while we figure it out.

6. Dads will protect. Period. We're built to serve. And serve our family we will. And if this means practically securing the perimeter fence against any evil-doers, then it will be done. If this means cross-examining the boy that just arrived at the door and is asking for your daughter, then it will be done. Our family will in no way be harmed. Whatever it takes. Remember we're always out to fix things ... and safety of our castle come first.

7. Dads can cry. Yes. We can. The funny thing about being a Dad is that I can cry now. I can cry when a situation is sad. I can cry during a movie. I can cry for joy. I can literally sob in happiness when I'm sharing a moment of joy with someone close. I call it 'through the looking glass syndrome'. The moment you've lost yourself and have become part of another emotion. And it's only happened after I've witnessed the birth of my kids.

8. Dads accept gifts. Any gifts. Because we've dealt with nappies and bottles we graciously accept any gift that comes from the heart. It can be a crayon scribble or a flower with no stem. It's a gift and our heart swells the moment it is given. This means that we don't expect the latest greatest expensive au du toilet or bottle of wine. We will equally accept something that is handmade and given with feeling. We accept gifts from the soul ... because we've seen a two year old preciously holding a crumpled bit of paper with a red heart of it in crayola. Precious.

9. Dads love company. We need our friends for the sake of sanity. Typical bar-room banter helps keep us grounded. The talk about the bar-lady with the big breasts and the rugby score with our mates is security for the soul. It's our comfy blanket. A well-timed evening with the boys is an investment in our role as Dad. It's the typical talk at break time all grown up. It's nothing more than that. Give us a night out every now and then and you will see the benefits.

10. Dads are constant. Did I mention that Dads love sex?